I look at you and don’t only see the beautiful young woman in the scarlet dress, I see my little girl who always searched for my hand when she was uncertain… You will always be this curious dichotomy – woman and little girl in my eyes. I remember singing you to sleep many nights, explaining that the dusting of freckles on your nose is like a sprinkling of fairy dust – magical beauty that you have been given. I still saw the adorable fairy dust on your nose tonight – and it seems to be so apt – my little girl is still in there somewhere. The dimples when you smile took my breath away when I discovered them the first time I held you swaddled in a blanket and tonight, the radiant smile brought many tears to my eyes.
I recall teaching you to read, teaching you the difference between hexagons and pentagons, nursery rhymes, colours and many other things. We spent hours colouring pictures, building puzzles and watching cartoons together. I will never forget the first day you went to Nursery School – the teacher called, you had punched a boy and given him a black eye – he had deserved it. It was hard not to chuckle and the teacher could hardly stifle her laugh – you have always been a feisty and fiery one and I realize just how appropriate the scarlet dress is tonight. I am so proud of the young woman you have become and I hold my breath each time you start a new chapter – how can I not?
My heart squeezes when I look at you because I realize that nothing under the sun compares to the love of a mother for her child. It is a different kind of vulnerability – seeing a wondrous incarnation of yourself outside of your own existence. Above all, I hope you will one day know just how much I do love you and how profoundly you have touched my life. I love you Snookums.
Love
Mommy
x
This is really touching!
ReplyDeleteI have two daughters who have grown up so very quickly!
A much loved and inspirational uncle of mine once said to me, "make the most of the time you have with them, as they will be grown up before you know it"
At the time my thoughts were different as my daughters were only little, but of course, looking back now, he was right!
The passage of time is strange, but at the same time fascinating!
I often look back and wish I could change things.
I also find it hard at times to forgive myself for things that happened in the past.
The last thing they expected when they were growing up is that their parents would split up.
What I find strange though is at that time it seemed like it was inevitable, like a force that was saying this is what you have to do, even though it did not feel right. Hard to explain but true nonetheless.
They are now both young adults and successful in their own ways. It's what I have missed when I was away from them that is sometimes hard to swallow.
I do believe though, that a power beyond our comprehension will have the answers.
Life situations do seem to happen for a reason.
Have a good week Debbie!
Chris